« Sports

Badminton match ends in brawl and stitches, wait should I be watching Badminton?

by Jon Henseler

First of all, the woman calling play by play at the beginning of this video needs to step it up a notch with the enthusiasm. Wake up sister! Not every day you see trash talking and a brawl in a badminton match. Like I realize when you're calling badminton you're probably not preparing for this type of violence but I'm sure Al Michaels didn't think Team USA would beat Russia either and he still managed to hammer out one of the great calls of all time. It's called being prepared. You sound like a fem-Joe Buck out there. 

Anyway this was kind of crazy no? Like I'm not a badminton expert but things don't usually end with one guy running from away like he's Ricky Bobby by a fire and the other guy Liu Kang-ing him before needing stitches on his ear. This thing looks like a Thai Worldstar Hip Hop* video. And these guys used to be teammates? Kind of reminds me of when Kane and Undertaker split up after being a tag team and went after each other (and you better believe Jim Ross was ready). So with the Brewers sitting at 42-58, Ryan Braun diappearing from earth faster than Judy Winslow and actual, real football still a month out, maybe it's time to hit up the badminton tour.

*Protip for the kids: If you ever hear somebody scream 'WORLDSTAR!!' run, and run as fast as you can.

PS: My buddy Steve and I were a badminton team during that part gym class our junior year at North. We were pretty good but not nearly as good as two Hmong students in our class who pretty much lived on the championship court for two weeks. Well one day Steve and I made it to the final court and much like the U.S. over Russia we set the stage for one of the greatest upsets that 4th period gym class during fall semester of 2001 ever saw. To this day my greatest athletic achievement. Haven't touched a shuttlecock since.

Double PS: If there is ever a Space Odyssey remake Joe Buck is a no brainer pick for Hal.